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First off IF you really want to survive, learn how to cook. You know build a fire and let it burn down before you add in your pot? Maybe for you we should just start on turning on the stove. . .
 
.Ijust sorta never really got a good opportunity for an adult to give me a run-down of cooking on the kitchen stove;the few things I've done I've just kinda had to FIGURE OUT on my own cos I was starving and mom doesn't cook anymore since the divorce lmao. 😭
Have you never heard of a concept called the COOKERY BOOK? You don't need an adult to show you how to do these things, you just need a book.
 
You said the first thing was to come to terms with your disorder. That's not the first step to prepping.
I'd say store water, food, medical items, and self defense items.
Beans, Bullets and Bandaids.
Prepping is preparing the things you need to survive.
 

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