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Just another bad day

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AmyReisch

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There's a man sitting at a bar just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half an hour.

Then, a big trouble-making bully steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down.

The poor man starts crying.

The bully was laughing, says, "why you crying because of drink? Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand seeing a man crying."

The man replied, "No, it's not that.

This day is the worst of my life.

First, I fall asleep, and I'm late to my office.

My boss, in an outrage, fires me.

When I leave the building to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police say they can't do anything.

I get a cab to return home and I remember I left my wallet and credit cards at the office.

I then walk home and when I get there, I find my wife sleeping with the gardener.

I leave home and come to this bar.

And when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
 

jayjay

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A father and son at the bar. The father buys a round and says to the son 'Here's a toast to the happiest day of your life'. The son says 'Dad, I'm not getting married till tomorrow'. Dad says 'Exactly'.
 
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